Dear Leighton

Leighton Wayne, 

I have been struggling with the words to truly express how I am feeling right now. There is such a muddy mess of excitement and almost guilt for the changes that are about to come your way. 

You are my first baby boy. You made me a mom. You taught me what true patience is (a virtue I am still working on daily). You have shown me a love I didn't know existed. You have my heart. And the same can be said for your dad.

Now another little boy is going to come into our life. A little tiny human who is going to need a lot of attention that you may not completely understand. I know that you will be the BEST big brother in the world. That you will help mommy and daddy rock him and talk to him when he cries. You will be such a help. 

I can't help but feel a little guilty though for completely disturbing your life. You will have to split the attention, be quiet more often, share your toys/blankets/books. 

As we made pancakes together, alone, for the last time on Sunday I started to feel all the emotions. You were just this little tiny human two years ago, and now you are mommy's little helper. As this new baby comes and we give him his share of the attention/focus, you are going to keep growing. 

My prayer is that God gives your dad and I the ability to handle it all with patience, open eyes and  grace. I know these next few months will be trying. I know you will get frustrated with this new situation and that you will most likely act out. I also know that you will be the most kind and loving little two year old when you are able to be. 

You and Hudson will be the best of friends and I can't wait to watch your relationship with each other develop and grow. Raising two little boys has been a hope of mine and I am so excited for the mess, chaos and love it will bring into our family. 

I love you Leighton Wayne. Your dad loves you. Your baby brother loves you. 

Don't blink, the world moves so, so quickly. 


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